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  • Writer's pictureDamaris Rojas

The Value Of Saying “No”

We are taught to be seen as nice and to be accepted. You need to comply with demands from the people that “matter.” This can end up making you believe that saying “yes” is the only answer that exists. I’m here to tell you it’s not true. You can say “yes” to everyone, yet everyone still isn’t happy. But saying “no” helps you every time and makes you feel good. Being an entrepreneur means being your own boss. Why surround yourself with people that don’t align with your values and goals?

Why Is It Important to Say “No”?: The Power of Saying “No”

Saying “no” affects the way you think and the way people treat you. It affects your mental health and how you value your time. You prioritize yourself and your needs. Being an entrepreneur is so hard when you say “yes” to everything. You need to let loose and remember you are only one person. By saying “no,” you let people know you mean business and create opportunities. You draw a line on how far people can go with asking you for favors. Like, do you answer calls 24/7? Or do they know you only answer at certain hours? It gives you a sense of power and makes people respect you.

When you say “yes,” you’re committing to invest time and energy into what they asked. Your precious resources should be given wisely. If you apply saying “no” to responsibilities that shouldn’t be yours to begin with, it will improve your health and well-being. How? Accepting certain conditions that you should say “no” brings unnecessary stress, lack of sleep, and maybe even a guilty conscious. Eliminate putting yourself in that position.

You need to just fuck it and say “yes” to only what aligns with your goals and values.

It gets you comfortable in your own mind, skin, spirit, and work environment. If you decide not to develop the skill of saying “no,” just know that “it is not that we have so little time but that we lose so much…the life we receive is not short, but we make it so because we have wastefully.” As Ancient Roman philosopher, Seneca, puts it.

Why Saying “No” Can Be Hard?

Saying “no” can be hard sometimes. It can give you anxiety, stress you out, make you feel guilty, create “enemies”, and so much more. But what’s worse? Caring about others at your expense. Constantly being in your own head or putting yourself first and letting go of the shame and guilt that society tries to put on you.

Getting a new client/customer and wanting to give them whatever they want to keep them is normal. The reason you shouldn’t do it is once you show you have no boundaries. There is no going back. It’s time to find your reasons for saying “yes” to everything and nip it in the bud.

If your reason is at your own expense, it’s time to say “no.” Are you saying “yes” because…

  • Not wanting the person to reject you afterward.

  • To try to avoid conflict or confrontation.

  • Not wanting to disappoint the person.

  • You don’t want to be rude.

  • Wanting to be accepted.

  • Don’t want to be selfish and inconsiderate.

  • You don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.

  • You genuinely want to help but have other commitments.

  • You want to show you’re a team player.

  • You’re so used to saying “yes.” You don’t realize you can say “no”.

Do any of these reasons look familiar? Great! Now you know where to start with this mindset hack. You can go into your business in the right headspace.

When to Say “No”?

This is good to know because you can’t say “no” to everything, either. You need a perfect balance of the two. Let’s mention a few situations to get the ball rolling.

  • Feeling uncomfortable: When you’re asked to do something that does not align with your values and goals as an entrepreneur. You kindly decline and find someone else.

  • You feel obligated to accept: When you feel forced to say “yes.” Force yourself to say “no”.

  • When you’re overloaded: Putting too much on your plate can cause you to half-ass everything. It’s better to say “no” and do wonderfully with what you have than say “yes” and potentially disappointing.

  • If the request crosses your personal boundaries: You are your own boss that wants to please your customers/clients but at the sacrifice of your personal life. Nooo!

  • If you are only saying yes to please someone else: You can’t please someone forever. They will just want more and more. Show them you are someone to respect, and they’ll like you as a business partner more for it.

It’s time to say “no” when you have more important tasks to do from your perspective. Your mental health and increasing your stress are not worth no task.

Put yourself first because if you don’t, no one will.

How to Say “No”?

Obviously, although you’re going to say “no,” you want to try your best to not be rude or get on someone’s bad side. You don’t need to give them personal information or even give them an excuse to explain your answer. All it takes is, I’m sorry, but I can’t do what you are asking but…” and give them another solution. Here are some steps that can help you get used to saying “no.”

  • Rehearse: Don’t be afraid to practice the questions you’ll have to say “no” to. Get in front of the mirror and practice your ass off.

  • Be honest: You want to reject the task but no need to make up an excuse that will eventually come back to haunt you. And let’s be honest, lying is hard work. You need to remember the lie, who you told it to, and think about who that person will tell. You’re already so stressed no need to add this to the mix.

  • Offer alternatives: Give them another solution. Recommend someone else. Let them know if they are willing to wait. You can do it at a later date. Simply give them another solution. This way, you are helpful in a different way.

  • Do not rush: We all have gotten those offers where you have to think twice on. Don’t be afraid to hold off on giving an answer. For example, in a meeting, I got an amazing partnership offer. We are doing a project together, so I let them know that I’ll have an answer after the project. If you’re doubting, give yourself some time.

Time to let go of the societal norm that saying “no” is wrong. Need help to do so? Well, here’s a coach that always says “Fuck it” (respectfully) and does what she wants to do. Let her teach you how she does it. Click the link below.

About The Author: I started my adult life as an English Teacher. I loved my job, and to this day, I miss my kids(students). Then the unthinkable happened. A truck ran over me while riding my bike. I lost my job and started to look for at-home employment. This is when copywriting came into my life. Ever since, I don't think about going back to teaching. I found my hidden passion!

I love hard work, which is my gentle way of saying I am a workaholic. I take my work seriously and don't like to waste my time, so I don’t waste other people’s time, either.

There is a saying, “keep it short and sweet.” I like to get to the point and then branch out from there. I can be a little silly sometimes, but it doesn’t mean I’m not serious about the current subject or situation.

I’m a huge helper if I don’t know how to help. I learned how I can help. For example, my boyfriend got sick, and I am no doctor, but I started to do a lot of research. Thankfully, because of my research, I was able to nurse him back to health. I appreciate the people that are trying to get ahead in life. They know they need help and aren’t afraid to ask. It only makes me want to help even more.

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